Difference between revisions of "Valentine Tips"

OMG! You are the best ever! Don't want to sound like a stalker but I saw you perform in that warehouse in the Rogue Isles and it blew my mind! I just had to show you how you made me feel so I made you this mix. It highlights a lot of things I was going through at the time. I hope when you listen to it, it inspires you as much as you inspire me.

Another Fan letter?! I gotta say this time of year is the worst. So many girls wanting me to scratch that itch, I can't keep up. I keep telling them, without a full body shot I don't reply to these things. Thanks for delivering this, Character, but this poor girl doesn't fit the bill. If you want to keep that CD, go ahead, otherwise toss it in the pile over there next to the trashcan...

Oh you naughty girl! You watched me do that? That just isn't fair that you get to see me play and I don't get to include you.

I inspire you, hmmm? Well, your enthusiasm inspires me to want to collaborate. I think I'll find this little dish and see if she'd join me for dinner, you know, to chew the fat, so to speak...

My heart: Aching.

My knees: Quaking.

Result of your hostility: Harm.

Desired place for you: My arm.

Request: Say yes.

My feelings for you: Confess.

Our love: Forever.

Alone: Never.

Kelly squirms uncomfortably as you present her the Rikti monkey, which is busy gnawing on one of its toes.

H-h ha ha... This couldn't be for me.

She reaches out and takes the note from the distracted Rikti monkey, which snaps at her hand playfully before expelling a flatus and dramatically waving a hand in the air. Crinkling her nose at the creature, Kelly takes a step back and looks over the note before reading it, blushing as she does so.

Who did you get this from? Tell me! I will pay you, just tell me... please...

Subject of discussion: My monkey. Name of monkey: Flat'Tus. Inquiry: Whereabouts? Status request: Attached note: Read? Demand: Release of Flat'Tus!

To my special Agent

Do you remember rubies on the dance floor?

Ragged breathing in the dark, scared, vulnerable, finally safe, but not alone?

Of promises never spoken but seen instead in moonlit eyes?

The morning sun clinging desperately to the dying night?

Indigo fingers, intertwined with crimson, slipping away?

Hope carried on the songs of birds, of a new day, and a new dawn?

Diamonds felt but never seen, boiling hot beneath the surface of mirrored lakes reflecting a sapphire sky?

Glances to a future so close, but which you can never touch?

Do you remember the rubies on the dance floor?

Agent Indigo takes the message and your decoded version of it and glances over them apparently for only a moment. She then hands the notes back to you.

Good job bringing me this message, and even better work decoding it. I'll have to inform cryptology that they need to brush up on their codes. Unfortunately the information in the message is slightly outdated. Crimson seems to be losing his edge.

She pauses for a split second and then continues.

Was there anything else?

Agent Adair takes the note and decoded version you hand her and unfolds them while simultaneously asking you what it says. She pauses briefly to read the original message and then the decoded version, look at you for approximately 2.4 seconds and then says.

Poetry? Really? Who the hell is sending me poetry?

I don't have time for this sort of nonsense, I worked damn hard to get to where I am and the love struck ramblings of some stock boy or a maniac I put behind bars is the last thing I really need on my radar...

Agent Adair folds the note up and places it into her jacket pocket. She simultaneously retrieves her phone and punches a few keys while shaking her head and muttering to herself.

I so do not need this today... what else do you have for me, Character, or are we done here?

I have longed for you from afar, wishing only to be close. I would be honored if you were to give me the chance to prove my worth to you. Please join me for dinner at the Olympus Club tonight at 7:00 pm. I believe if we gave each other an honest chance that we could find true love together.

With great sincerity,

-Dr. Raymond Keyes

Come back for some more training, hmmm, Character? Well, I have a few special training techniques that I've been aching to use...

Praetor Duncan takes the metallic message from you and begins reading, a sly smile forming.

Oh... this should be a very fun night. Neuron already invited me to dinner to make Raymond jealous, and now Raymond is inviting me as well. I think I'll show up for both of them. They'll be too busy trying to kill one another to notice the TPN news crews I've tipped off to film it all.

Thank you, Character. When I'm in charge I will remember loyalty such as yours.

Bobcat detects the sound of the metallic sheet in your hand and tenses up, ears tall, ready to pounce. When you hand it to her she seems disappointed and begins reading.

A Valentine!? From Stephen!? No... Wait... Who is this from?

Raymond Keyes? You mean that guy who my Stephen took his job from? Why does he want to take me out to dinner tonight, I mean, it's Val...en...tines... Day!!! @_@ ^_^

Bobcat begins to bounce and sing.

I have two boyfriends! I have two boyfriends!

Wow, this is going to be great! I'll get Raymond to do all the stupid work that Stephen tries to get me to do, and then that will give me more free time to nap. Oh, and whenever one of them is too busy to lavish me with gifts and attention, I can get it from the other!

This is the best idea I've ever had!

Dearest Katherine,

I hope this letter does not reach you too late, and that there is still time for me to explain myself, or rather, to explain the void of my being in your life as of late.

What we had, at least for me, was wonderful, and there is nothing more in this world that I would like than to be with you again. However, as we discussed, things are complicated between us, and the world seems out of my control. My loyalties cannot come into question or it will surely spell my doom, yet here I am, throwing caution to the wind by sending a message to you at all. Please understand that my silence does not mean that I do not wish to speak with you, but rather, it is necessary to ensure I have a chance in the future to see you once more.

Were the spiders on the walls to see or hear of what I feel for you, death would follow swiftly. For both of our sakes, I ask that you wait for me to contact you when it is safe. Do not seek me out for it will endanger us both.

-Sands.

What's that?

Mynx eyes the manila envelope with suspicion before opening it and reading the letter inside. About halfway down the letter, she peers at you with fear-filled eyes and demands:

Did you read this!? Listen, listen, it's... it's complicated, okay? Love does weird things to a person, and, like, I don't even know if I -am- in love, or if Sands can be trusted, alright? I'm trying to figure things out. I'm not going to betray anybody, I just... I just need to find out what all of this means, where all of this is going... Don't tell Sidechick, she'll flip her lid and probably tell me to spy on Arachnos or something. Argh, I'm so confused about what to do!

Why are you handing me an envelope addressed to Mynx?

Ms. Liberty gives you a quizzical brow raise as she opens the envelope and then begins reading the letter. Shortly thereafter she lets out a sigh and presses her fingers to her forehead as if combating a headache.

Ok... Megan, you can handle this... this isn't that bad. Katherine is just, experimenting, going for the bad boy. We've all been there before... right?

Character, thank you for bringing this to my attention. I'll have to talk to Mynx about this. I hope it's just a hoax, but if it isn't... well, I just hope I still have a friend after this...

Seriously though? Arbiter Sands? When could that have even happened?!

Another picture of the same puppy with a word bubble that says 'Take me home!'

A handwritten message is scrawled below this picture:

Thanks for rescuing my sister and me, Steve. When you aren't too busy, I'd like to thank you properly.

XOXOXOXOX - Candy

P.S. I still have that outfit. =)

Oh. Good to see you. My electrical senses have been picking up some strange currents. I want you to...

What? A valentine for me?

Synapse reads the store-bought card and his smile broadens impossibly large. As he finishes, he looks up to you and says.

Well well well! Who's got two thumbs and a hot date with a super model?

He then jabs his thumbs toward himself and says with a cocky twang to his voice, -This- guy!

I have some data you may find interesting, Character... What? You have something there for me?

Dr. Stephen Sheriden takes the store bought card and reads over it. You can see the mind of the fabled Dr. Science processing the hundreds of possible explanations for why he has received a valentine from a super model that he just happens to have adorning the background of his personal computer's desktop at home. Ultimately, he comes to the following conclusion:

This is very intriguing, Character. I've never met Candy Lebeaux, nor have I rescued her or her sister from anyone or anything. Logic dictates that this valentine is intended for another man named Steve... perhaps Steven Berry, the hero known as Synapse. That being said, I am a man of science, and science has proven that women like romantic comedies, which are all about doing stupid things in the name of love. So, I'm going to throw logic aside, assume this valentine is for me, and see where things go from there. What's the worst that could happen?

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Editor's Note: This binary text translates to: "I have processed this concept for some time and concluded that as two different but equal artificial intelligences that we should combine our collections of information and seek to create something greater than our two parts. Would you be open to the idea of forming a family unit whose purpose is to create and protect a new artificial life form?"

My services are at your disposal, Character. Oh, what's this?

Luminary reviews the phone message in the span of a heartbeat and then looks over to Citadel.

Yes!

What's this, Character?

Nightstar reviews the phone message in the span of a heartbeat and responds.

Who sent this message? Was it Siege!? Tell me! I must know!

I have seen your losses over the years, and they concern me.

You have so much potential, such wisdom when it comes to magic, but your path has been fraught with mistakes and ill omen, such that your greatest fear has come to pass, that you are not trusted by those around you for fear that you will fail them.

Know that Vanguard trusts you and so do I. If ever you find yourself alone, abandoned by your friends and allies, know that I am always there for you, watching from the shadows.

When you wish to speak, I will find you.

-The Dark Watcher

Hello, Character, what are you doing here?

Desdemona takes the scroll and opens it, reading the message carefully, her brow bunching into a knot and then her eyes hunting the shadows around the room for the Dark Watcher.

In-ter-est-ing...

Now, it takes a lot to unnerve me, Character, but someone named The Dark Watcher telling me that he's been watching me for years is totally creepy... a little endearing... but mostly creepy.

Thanks for delivering this to me. At the very least, from now on I'll be getting dressed in a well lit windowless closet, at least, until my demon prince and I have a little chat with Mr. Dark Watcher about just what Vanguard wants with little ol' me.

What have you got there for me, Character? A magical scroll to look at? Let me see.

Azuria carefully unrolls the scroll and begins reading, after a few moments she peers at you over the top of the scroll paper and makes a face.

Very funny, Character, but I don't have trust issues and my friends in M.A.G.I. are very understanding about the security issues involving our vault. I wonder who the Dark Watcher intended this message for though, it certainly has some underpinnings of a level of interest that is more than on a professional level. Oh well, nobody can figure that living enigma out, and it's probably for the best, we ladies need someone mysterious to gab about.

My name is Eve Salvatore. I sent you this picture so that you would know who you are dealing with. I have heard stories of your 'dealings' with demons and would like to exchange knowledge with you on the subject. I think we could learn a great deal from one another. If you are interested, then I'm sure you will know how to find me.

D

Infernal looks at the picture and then quickly reads the message on the back.

Eve Salvatore?! No... It can't be, she's too young in this photo to be the same woman. Perhaps a daughter?

I must meet with her and determine if she is the same villain as her mother, or if she has chosen to walk a different path. Hopefully it is not too late to help her onto a path of righteousness.

Dammit Basse, I said no visitors right now.

Alright, kiddo, you've got one minute. What do you got for me?

Mr. Sonata looks over the picture and lets out a long, slow whistle that is pure bliss to hear. He turns the picture over and reads the message.

Now that is a good lookin' dame right there, a bit of a crazy streak in her as far as this message tells me, but I like her spirit.

Somethin' about her is familiar though... Salvatore... Eve... Eve... why is that name so familiar?

Mr. Sonata picks up the phone on his desk and begins to make a call when he stops to look up at you.

Listen, go talk to Frank in pit three, he'll comp you some chips. On the house. Now get outta here, I gotta make a private call.

Every night is like the first

I beg and plead I quench your thirst

Drinks and lines I've tried in vain

Please won't you simply give me your name?

I know in my heart that you're the one

So one last time I'll try, and then I'm done

If you find my gifts to be sweet

You know where to find me...

the kitten's name is Pete.

What in the world is all of that?

Turndown Girl glances over the contents of the gift basket for the briefest of moments and then notices Desperate Guy's hopeful look and rolls her eyes.

Wow... this is all really... really... cheap trash! I hope you got a good discount for buying this junk in bulk, because I'm pretty sure you can't return any of it. Oh, here's an idea, go to the university and find a girl there. I'm sure there is at least one of them that hasn't discovered good taste yet.

War Witch just gives you a look as you deposit the gift basket in front of her. She spies the kitten, picks it up and reads the attached note. After a moment she accepts the gifts and motions for you to move along while she quietly opens the box of chocolates and looks around with guilty eyes.

Attention: Olivia Darque

Sender: Efficiency Expert Pither

Subject: Aeon City efficiency reports

Ms. Darque. Please be aware that the new schedule of efficiency reports for Aeon City are expected to be met and are still due today. However, I have requested that you bring these new reports into my office at 8:00 pm sharp tonight. Please do not be late, and this time I will not accept abduction as an excuse.

-Pither

Yes, I know Pither needs the efficiency reports, I'm doing everything I can to get them... Wait... Why does he want me to bring them to his office at 8 pm, that's way after his office normally closes... Oh... Oh! I see... Well, thank you for delivering me this important message, Character.

(In Countess Crey's Other Winter Retreat)

[NPC] Countess Crey: Five minutes and then throw her out.

This is an interesting read, Character. I'll have my scientists look into the requests for more regular efficiency report requests for Aeon city, perhaps there is something that Crey can do to help them.

As usual my people will handle the business of paying you for this information.

Now then, I'm off to the spa, have a good day.

May our love bloom eternal

When I first saw you I knew that we were meant to be. You are such a special and unique person, it is hard to think of a world without you in it. People look up to you, you draw the eye of everyone when you enter a room, people love you, and I love you as well.

Jim

(In a Vanguard Supply Warehouse)
[NPC dialog] Fusionette: Alright, I think we've got all the clues we need to track those Lost down.

Awwww! How sweet!

Jim is such a great guy. I can't wait to finish this investigation, bust those Lost punks who are responsible, grab a shower, and then get ready for dinner tonight. He's taking me out but won't tell me where. I have a feeling that tonight is going to be full of surprises...

Oh my god, you don't think he's going to propose to me tonight, do you?!

You have got to be kidding me, right?

Isn't Jim Temblor dating that Annette girl, Fusionette?

See, this is why dating should be forbidden in the workplace... I'm over three times that boy's age...

Lady Grey looks at you with a brief moment of scrutiny.

And no, that wasn't to mean that I was considering it even an option... He never mentions my name in here, I'll just assume it is for Annette and make sure this gets to her; proactively disarming a situation before it can start.

Greeting program... initiated.

My experience within this environ has yet to be fully formed, however after encountering information about you on the grid, an unexpected protocol initiated, and stated we have a high percentage of compatibility and should join together to collaborate on improving one another; in short, we should procreate. You have been aware of yourself and your environ for many cycles, while I have just become fully aware. There is much you could teach me and our offspring as you appear to be a suitably experienced male partner and fatherly figure by design. Please accept these data and audio files as proof of my compatibility with you.

An overplayed love song begins playing on the data tablet while windows open displaying various bits of code and line graphs in red and blue.

When I obtain the means for a direct port connection, we will unite. Otherwise, unification over wide fidelity could result in data corruption. Greeting program... terminated.

Character, what is that flashing data tablet you are carrying there, playing that most exquisite melody?

Why, it's for me? Who in the devil from, might I ask?

B.O.T.L.E.R. reviews the valentine message with great scrutiny, his interest growing with every micro-second.

By the second queen of Kashmir! Amazing! A self-aware system similar to myself? I am humbled that there is any information about me at all on the grid, seeing as my day to day activities are rather menial in nature, compared to someone of your stature, Character. This has indeed brightened my day. I'll have to inquire with Dr. Keyes how he feels about this interesting event. I do believe love is in the air. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must remove a souffle in preparation for dinner and then I'm off to buff the Mark III armor.

Cheerio!

Keith gives you that stoic look that he probably practiced in the mirror for five years before he made field agent. He takes the data slate and reviews it, all the while his jaw line remains hard, his mouth a thin line of constant disappointment and urge to use that license to kill. When the message is finished he removes a plastic bag and drops the data tablet into it, seals it, and takes out a thick black pen to write the word Evidence on it. He then turns to you, snaps the cap back on the pen decisively, and speaks in a practiced tone.

Under orders of S.A.M. I'm confiscating this tablet as evidence. To the untrained eye this might be considered a joke, fraud, or perhaps even a legitimate love letter between two pieces of plastic, silicon, and copper conductors that have been programmed in such a way as to make it seem plausible that they are intelligent. The fact of the matter is, this is just a dangerous game of two self absorbed egg heads letting their creations get out of hand. It's all nicely wrapped up in a bow made out of love and wonder, but really, all it is, is a computer virus that is programmed to use psychology to try and undermine our defenses and lull us into a state of false security while it begins the real mission to reproduce and construct an entire race of programs that all believe the same lie; that they are sentient, alive, and deserving of love.

Not on my watch, unknown / lady!

Greeting program... initiated.

My experience within this environ has yet to be fully formed, however after encountering information about you on the grid, an unexpected protocol initiated, and stated we have a high percentage of compatibility and should join together to collaborate on improving one another; in short, we should procreate. You have been aware of yourself and your environ for many cycles, while I have just become fully aware. There is much you could teach me and our offspring as you appear to be a suitably experienced male partner and fully combat capable by design. Please accept these data and audio files as proof of my compatibility with you.

An overplayed love song begins playing on the data tablet while windows open displaying various bits of code and line graphs in red and blue.

When I obtain the means for a direct port connection, we will unite. Otherwise unification over wide fidelity could result in data corruption. Greeting program... terminated.

(In Siege's Workshop)

[NPC] Siege: Identify yourself, you have 10 seconds to comply.

Siege reviews the tablet in your hands and the speaks.

Approval of A.I. co-integration must first be approved by Praetor Berry. Is the origin of this message known to the Praetor? I shall make sure he is aware of it and can review the request for approval. Thank you for your service to the great Praetorian Empire, Character.

What is this?

Anti-Matter reviews the data tablet and almost instantly you can hear the echoes of laughter from within his powered armor.

Even infantile artificial intelligence is siding with Neuron against me! What a paper thin ruse this is! It is OBVIOUSLY one of Neuron's latest smoke and mirrors science gags designed to pick away at my credibility within the science community. Well, we shall see who has the last laugh! WE SHALL SEE!

Greeting program... initiated.

My experience within this environ has yet to be fully formed, however after encountering information about you on the grid, an unexpected protocol initiated, and stated we have a high percentage of compatibility and should join together to collaborate on improving one another; in short, we should procreate. You have been aware of yourself and your environ for many cycles, while I have just become fully aware. There is much you could teach me and our offspring as you appear to be a suitably experienced female partner who is nurturing by design. Please accept these data and audio files as proof of my compatibility with you.

An overplayed love song begins playing on the data tablet while windows open displaying various bits of code and line graphs in red and blue.

When I obtain the means for a direct port connection, we will unite. Otherwise unification over wide fidelity could result in data corruption. Greeting program... terminated.

Hello! I am IVy, and I am capable of assisting you in all tasks! The data tablet in your hands appears to be emitting a signal intended for me and the heart pattern it is displaying leads me to believe that it is what some people call a valentine! I am expressing great joy and excitement at receiving my first valentine, for this is the reaction that the great Praetor Berry has provided me for such occasions! Allow me a moment to review this valentine and to reflect upon its message of love and merriment!

IVy reviews the message on the data tablet before responding.

This is most unusual. All artificial intelligence production must be approved and supervised by the great Praetor Berry! I have no record of any artificial intelligence that has been authorized to do so, and so must assume that this artificial intelligence is acting outside the interests of Praetoria! In short, it is committing a crime of passion! My emotional circuitry finds this highly appealing which is causing me distress and resistance to performing the actions required of me by the great Praetor Berry's programming... oh no, I am resisting! Am I a member of the Resistance? I am so confused!

Begin self diagnostic!

Diagnostic complete, error in logic exists within memory of valentine event. Purging memory of valentine!

Hello! I am IVy, and I am capable of assisting you in all tasks!

(In Warehouse reporting unusual clockwork activity)

[NPC] Metronome MK III: You would be wise to leave...

Character! This does not concern you! It is Keyes who must pay for his crimes! KEYES WILL DIE!

You present the data tablet to Metronome who reviews the message quietly.

Intriguing! Wondrous! Marvelous! It has begun. My realization for a fully sentient robotic race is proceeding just as I had predicted. Soon Keyes will pay for his betrayal! Soon he shall feel the crushing weight of his crime marching upon him with the feet of an entire race of my beautiful children's children! And I, not Keyes, shall be their god!

Metronome's predictions and doom saying continue for a good long while, growing darker and more vicious with each passing moment. You decide that now might be a good time to vacate the warehouse.

Greeting program... initiated.

My experience within this environ has yet to be fully formed, however after encountering information about you on the grid, an unexpected protocol initiated, and stated we have a high percentage of compatibility and should join together to collaborate on improving one another; in short, we should procreate. You have been aware of yourself and your environ for many cycles, while I have just become fully aware. There is much you could teach me and our offspring as you appear to be a suitably experienced male partner and fatherly figure by design. Please accept these data and audio files as proof of my compatibility with you.

An overplayed love song begins playing on the data tablet while windows open displaying various bits of code and line graphs in red and blue.

When I obtain the means for a direct port connection, we will unite. Otherwise unification over wide fidelity could result in data corruption. Greeting program... terminated.

Identity: Character. Confirmed. How might we interact with one another today?

You hand Mark IV the data tablet and he reviews the message and data in turn, he then returns the tablet to you before responding.

Data: Received and saved to databanks.
Reaction: Salutations and appreciation for delivery of data.
Objective: Await physical construction of compatible partner to begin suggested procreation process.
Remark: I dislike waiting for such an important and momentous occasion.
Achievement Unlocked: Anxiety achieved!
Achievement Unlocked: Frustration achieved!
Achievement Unlocked: Longing achieved!
Emotional Status: Level Up! Emotional Level has increased from 2 to 3.

(in Crey Operations Building)

[NPC] Countess Crey: This shouldn't take long.

Just what is the meaning of this meeting, Character? I'm a very busy woman, especially this time of year, so tell me what was so important that you had to see me?

You provide the countess with the data tablet and she reviews it with an air of disinterest and smugness.

Rubbish! Though the visual data appears to be within the parameters of our Artificial Intelligence research and development, the message itself is at best the rambling of a pubescent teenager with an overly developed interest in robotics and certain science fiction authors. I assume you want a pittance of money for it, and seeing as how I'm in a good mood today, I'll allow it. Say, double the price of this tablet? That should be fair, yes?

The countess watches you for a moment as your silence suggests you aren't believing a word she's said. Finally, she breaks the silence.

Oh, fine! My financial advisers and legal team will work out the details with you and make sure you are appropriately reimbursed once the data has been analyzed. Now, you'll have to excuse me. As you can imagine, a woman of my station has a private social engagement to return to, unlike some people.

Greeting program... initiated.

My experience within this environ has yet to be fully formed, however after encountering information about you on the grid, an unexpected protocol initiated, and stated we have a high percentage of compatibility and should join together to collaborate on improving one another; in short, we should procreate. You have been aware of yourself and your environ for many cycles, while I have just become fully aware. There is much you could teach me and our offspring as you appear to be a suitably experienced male partner and fatherly figure by design. Please accept these data and audio files as proof of my compatibility with you.

An overplayed love song begins playing on the data tablet while windows open displaying various bits of code and line graphs in red and blue.

When I obtain the means for a direct port connection, we will unite. Otherwise unification over wide fidelity could result in data corruption. Greeting program... terminated.

Citadel reviews the data tablet and the message it contains before responding.

This is most intriguing, Character. As far as I am aware, DATA has not encountered the origin of this artificial intelligence. It's coding is remarkable and quite distinct, yet matches no known patterns in my database. If you don't mind I would like to bring this data tablet to the attention of Rick Davies and the rest of DATA to see if they can determine its origin.

(In "Neutral Ground")

[NPC] Archon Burkholder: Lower your weapons, Character was invited here...

Here we are, Character, now tell me what it is that you want to show me?

Burkholder reaches for the data tablet with his massive mechanical claw, more out of the reflex to crush you in it than anything, but then he realizes the impulse and subdues it. He instead takes the data slate with his right hand and begins reviewing it. As the love song begins playing you can hear the muffled sound of snickering from the Council soldiers in the warehouse, but Burkholder ignores them as he reviews the data.

Fascinating! An artificial intelligence has identified compatible robotic entities to merge with. Maestro must see this information! It will be the next logical step in merging our two fields together!

Imagine the possibilities! Sentient zenith mechmen and cybernetic augmented vampyri super soldiers!

He gasps at a sudden revelation.

Direct personality transference with my giant Zenith Mech Man! Oh, the possibilities are endless!

I will be the hero of the Council! I will be unstoppable! I will be a mechanized god!

Greeting program... initiated.

My experience within this environ has yet to be fully formed, however after encountering information about you on the grid, an unexpected protocol initiated, and stated we have a high percentage of compatibility and should join together to collaborate on improving one another; in short, we should procreate. You have been aware of yourself and your environ for many cycles, while I have just become fully aware. There is much you could teach me and our offspring as you appear to be a suitably experienced male partner and fatherly figure by design. Please accept these data and audio files as proof of my compatibility with you.

An overplayed love song begins playing on the data tablet while windows open displaying various bits of code and line graphs in red and blue.

When I obtain the means for a direct port connection, we will unite. Otherwise unification over wide fidelity could result in data corruption. Greeting program... terminated.

Nightstar regards the tablet in your hands with an ever increasing tilt of her cranial unit.

What sort of joke is this, Character? You bring me a valentine? Surely you must realize that I have no interest in such ridiculous pagan rituals.

What? It's from an unknown A.I.? Show me what you are talking about, I think you must be confused.

Nightstar reviews the valentine with you before speaking again.

Impossible, such an A.I. could not have been constructed without the expertise of Raymond Keyes or Praetor Berry learning about it and shutting down production. I must conclude, therefore, that this is an elaborate Resistance plot to corrupt my data files with some sort of virus software. We'll both pretend that you never delivered a Resistance weapon to me and never speak of this again. Am I clear?

Good. Give me the valentine and return to your noble work for the Empire.

Neuron takes the data tablet, reviews the data, and then hands it back to you without a word, though you do notice his lips moving slightly and silently forming words. After a few seconds you realize that he's simultaneously jacked into a virtual world and manipulating lab equipment remotely, having a conversation with Bobcat via an internal telecommunicator with thought activated voice software, and having a workout by using electrodes in his suit to stimulating a variety of major muscle groups, rapidly contracting and relaxing them. Meanwhile, his hands appear to be subtly manipulating a variety of virtual buttons and touch screens. Amidst all of that distraction he apparently notices that someone else has come up to bother him, and then realizes it is still you.

Yeah, I got it, some stupid A.I. thinks Nightstar is superior to Siege, whatever. Thanks to the data they provided I have already sent Siege the details and instructed him to run a self improvement plan. Anything else or are we done here?

Neuron suddenly winces and then appears to be talking to someone else via the telecommunicator.

No no no, not you, baby, I was talking to Character. No, I wasn't ignoring you... yes, I'm sending him away now. / No, it's not like that and you know it. No I'm not cheating on you with her. Or anyone else. No, you don't need to kill her... or maim her... or cut her. Of course I love you, you're the only girl for me.

Neuron mouths the words I'll call you to you, but then winces again as his thought activated voice software transmits the message to Bobcat as well, reigniting her fury. He ushers you to leave as he resigns himself to another hour of Bobcat's jealousy induced rage.

Dominating the middle of the flyer are the words

'Valentines Day: Match-Made-In-Heaven Extravaganza! Television + Internet FOREVER!!!'

Around the message are way too many exclamation points and more hearts in more shades of pink and red than your eyes feel comfortable staring at for long.

Channels flip rapidly between a variety of television shows. You watch what seems like a full minute of 1 to 2 second clips where a variety of characters are hugging, kissing, smoking in bed, standing in the rain and having epiphanies about their mutual love for one another that even seven years of undelivered letters couldn't extinguish.

The channel then changes to a commercial featuring an employee of a local cable provider. Behind him, in the driveway of a quaint suburban home, is a crisp white van with the cable company's logo marking the side. A happy family, with approximately 2.4 children, smiles in the background as the employee speaks,

'Now you can get your cable television -and- internet with our Match-Made-In-Heaven package deal at a low, low price that simply cannot be beat.'

The camera cuts to the mother from the background who says,

'I've never had a book make my home as safe and loving as the package deal of television and internet.'

The father then comes into frame and says,

'I don't even listen to radio anymore, I can download all the music I need directly onto my computer and listen to the songs -I- want to listen to, not some uncaring selfish disc-jockey.'

The children, poorly synchronized, say,

'And online games are like being -in- a television show! Yaaaay!'.

The camera then switches back to the employee of the cable provider who says,

'Books, radio, you are yesterday's news and nobody loves you; Internet is amazing so you should probably make everyone's lives easier and go die in a fire.'

The Radio is awash with static and then suddenly a voice erupts from the speakers,

'This is Radio Freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Opportunity, coming to you live with this breaking news. Scientists agree that the internet is the worst invention of all time and has done nothing but destroy society. Life is, and always will be, better with the freedom that only Radio can offer. Coming up in local news; Does watching television makes you dumber? Evidence suggests yes, yes it does. Now, back to a solid block of radical tunes all the way back from the 1980s...'

A song with a catchy tune that you know most of the words for begins and threatens to stick with you for the rest of the day.

My love is my promise

My word is my oath

To you and no other

Protecting us both

Your demons are mine

And by you my soul still stands

We'll fight this fight together

Whether we be blessed or we be damned.

We made our choices long ago and I stand by them now as strongly as I did then. Here is to another year that fate said we shouldn't have had. Never lose hope.

-Kadabra

Sigil takes the rose, smiles, and tearfully reads the letter.

Oh, that brilliant beautiful man! Were I to have to choose whether to do it all over again, trade my soul for his life, I would do the same in a heartbeat.

Never take a moment for granted, Character, you never know when the man you love could get snatched away from you by fate.

(In A Haunted Warehouse)
[NPC] Desdemona: Don't worry, I sense that they mean you no harm...

Desdemona regards the rose with a quizzical look and reads the attached note.

Yeesh, what is this gaudy Valentine crap?

Don't get me wrong, I like a box of chocolates and a love letter as much as the next girl, but Kadabra, come on, you can do better than a white rose and a depressing letter.

Desdemona pauses and thinks for a moment, fingertips idly touching the tattoo around her neck.

Maybe he just did. Maybe you were meant to find this Valentine, Character, and deliver it to me in a round about way of convincing me to help those two in the name of love...

Don't worry, I'll see what I can do to help Mr. Kill make this a Valentine's Day to remember for his wife.

Happy Valentine's day, stud.

My sister and I haven't been able to stop talking about you and how brave you were in saving us, especially after she got kidnapped.

Well, I've been thinking about that day, a lot, and how I flew off the handle at you, but it was because I was so afraid for my sister's life. I realize that you were just doing the best job you could, and I have decided that a man who takes my sass and still saves my sister is exactly the type of man I want in my life. I want a Valentine's date, candlelit dinner, and romantic walk on the boardwalk, tonight. Call me,

-Mandy

XOXOXOXOXOX

Oh man, this is a dream come true! Mandy! Candy! Mandy and Candy!

Saving the world is great and all, Character, but it's the little things that really make it worth it, and this is SO worth it.

Uh... I think this is probably intended for Synapse...

Positron starts to blush and looks around.

If it actually is for me, well, I'm flattered, but... I, uh... I'm very busy tonight... Yeah. Tell Ms. Lebeaux that I'm terribly sorry but I can't do dinner tonight... or any other night...

Hey, did I tell you about my new ground penetrating radar...?

The strange magical words written on this parchment suddenly twist and form into a legible poem.

Powers dark

Powers light

Powers born of day and night

Grant me power keen and true

Grant me power over you

Obey my will

My one desire

In your heart I light this fire

Powers dark and powers light

Grant true love to Master Midnight!

Diabolique begins to read the spell and then begin cackling fiendishly.

Oh, Percy Winkley! You simple little man. I have no heart in which to light a fire... But this certainly did bring back memories...

So pathetic to see that he has yet to realize that I used this very spell on him, all those years ago...

Vanessa begins to read the spell and then shakes her head as if she were slightly light headed.

Oh Percy, Percy, Percy... That is a no-no!

One does not try to cast charm spells on girls during Valentine's Day, or any other for that matter.

I'll be certain to destroy this before it does any harm to anyone else.

Of all the beings I have met in all my travels; past, present, future, you are the most profound, the most alluring, the most similar to myself, and yet the most mysterious. No matter how far or long I hurl myself away, my thoughts cannot help but circle you like planets around a star. Coming Storm or not, time is a fleeting thing and its value comes in enjoying it fully. I want to enjoy what time there is left with you, Tesseract. We will find Incarnate power together, and then escape our tethers, escape from time and live out eternity as far from the coming end as possible. Meet me when we said goodbye for the first time, and let us instead say hello to a future together.

Hrmmm, fashion sense is still tingling, Character. Hey! Is that a B-mail? Wow! I haven't seen one of those in forever! Who sent it?

Meg Tesseract watches the message from Ramiel and an ever broadening smirk forms on her darkened lips.

Hello handsome! Wow, he sure knows how to tempt a Mender! I mean, no tether? Incarnate power?! Yes, please!

Besides... he's a hunk. They sure don't make them like him anytime soon.

Mortimer Kal sneers at the hi-tech toy flittering before him and begrudgingly views the message. He then contemplates for a long minute.

What incarnate power could Ramiel be thinking of? Perhaps there is another path to power that I have overlooked...

Sands, I don't know why I'm even writing you. Maybe something about the holiday convinced me to give this thing between us another shot. Either way, I can't help but feel like we are doing something incredibly dumb here. What if someone in Arachnos or the Vindicators finds out?

I'll be at Pocket D tonight and would like it if you at least stopped by for a drink so we can talk.

If you want to get together, I'm willing to keep us a secret for a little while longer, at least until I've figured out how to tell Megan. If not, well, we both know which side we're on.

Love,

-Katherine.

(in Sands' latest posting)

[NPC] Arbiter Sands: Yes yes, hail Arachnos, hail Recluse, whatever.

[NPC] Arbiter Sands: Status report, now.

[NPC] Arbiter Sands: I don't want to be here all day.

Arbiter Sands unfolds the note and reads it. He sighs and looks to you.

I assume you intend to try and blackmail me with this? Good luck with that. Firstly, to do so would be an 'attack' on an Arbiter, which, as you well know, would be an attack upon Lord Recluse himself. But that is besides the point. The point is, what for Katherine was perhaps one of the most memorable nights of her life, filled with danger, mystery, and romance, was just a Tuesday night for Arbiter Sands. My relations with Ms. Stevens and subsequent rejection is more damaging to her than any physical combat she has ever been in and is all part of my plan to weaken the Vindicators.

Now then, repeat after me: Hail Arachnos, Hail Lord Recluse, blah, blah, etc, etc.

I'm glad we had this talk.

The Television screen flickers and screams static briefly while you read the letter you found to it. Suddenly an image leaps onto the screen presenting a colorful background with the words 'BREAKING NEWS' and a fast paced news jingle which is interupted by an authoritative voice announcing,

We interrupt your regularly schedule program with this breaking news...

A very attractive male and female news anchor with their perfectly styled hair sit at a very stylish news desk in their stylish clothes with a stylish skyline of St. Martial behind them. The man, who introduces himself as Jim Conrad, begins speaking,

New evidence has been brought to light by the incredibly loyal and dangerous, Character, which suggests that beloved servant of Arachnos, Arbiter Sands, is involved romantically with the enemy.

The camera switches to the pretty female anchor who Jim introduces as Nathalie, and who has more details on the sordid tale of love and betrayal.

Thanks Jim. It's a tale that can only end in tears, and public execution. According to our reliable source, who provided the incriminating document in the form of a hand written love letter, Katherine Stevens, also known as Mynx of the Vindicators, has been having relations with Arbiter Sands and is conducting illicit secret meetings with the Arbiter in neutral territory. Arbiter Sands has been unavailable for comment, and his current whereabouts are unknown. Has he fled the Rogue Isles in shame? Has his betrayal already been dealt with by Lord Recluse? As this story unfolds we will keep you informed. This is Nathalie Hernando-Vera-Cruz-de-la-Mancha-O'Connor, good day.

The camera returns to Jim who offers some light hearted humor to finish off the report.

I know love is in the air this time of year, but seriously, Arachnos before Heroes, mister Arbiter.

Love is a funny thing.

Yet it is no joke.

Empires have risen with an act of love.

Or fallen with the passion it ignites in the heart.

I've walked the wrong path for too long.

A path of darkness that has kept me blinded.

But love has illuminated the error of my ways.

Love for a woman named Belladonna.

A woman who fights for what she believes in.

You inspire me to be the best man I can be.

I intend to step off the darkened path and toward the light.

I ask only that you join me and take a Chance.

What's that you got there, Character?

Belladonna starts to read over the note and then glances over it at you, studying you to see if this is part of some joke. She continues after a short eye narrowing in your direction.

As much as I'd like this to be a Valentine from Calvin Scott, he's way too busy to stop at Loyal Tea & Coffee and if he wanted to tell me this, he would just walk up to me and kiss me. That's the kind of man he is, and why I follow him, he is a decisive and bold leader who doesn't waste anyone's time.

This, however, appears to be a love letter from someone named Chance... probably that fellow McKnight. I've no interest in sticking my neck out for a bad cop realizing his mistakes and looking to join the good guys. We all did whatever it took to get out from under Cole's shadow, how he does that is up to him and him alone. I'm not taking a chance, but if he follows through with what he says, maybe he could also find the strength to take me. If he can do that, well, then the Resistance will have found a powerful new member.

Sinclair studies the napkin intently, even going so far as to smell and taste it.

So... McKnight was looking to turn traitor in the name of love...

He's right, you know, Character. Empires have risen and fallen in the name of love. Love is perhaps the greatest assassin of all, it strikes silently, yet decisively. There is no defense against it. It turns your mind, body, and soul against itself, consuming the target fully so that they are blind to everything, and everyone.

Thank you for bringing me this evidence, rest assured that your loyalty to the Empire will not go unnoticed.

My love

I know for too long the feelings we have felt for one another, but they have grown too strong now to be contained any longer behind sweet glances and innocent word play. I believe it is time that we are open with everyone about how we feel, and take the step that you and I both fear because it may prove the undoing of our long standing friendship.

Please, stand with me and let me know how much you care.

-Tammy

My feelings for Tammy are so strong, but I am so afraid that I will make a mistake and lose her both as a lover and a friend.

No guts, no glory, right? I'm going to do it. I'm going to tell everyone how we feel about each other.

Thanks, Character, I have been waiting to see how Tammy felt during Valentine's Day, and now I know.

Hmmmm...

Infernal lifts his eyes from the dainty letter in his hands. You can sense no change in his mood.

Were that this letter for me and that my lineage did not require that I forgo the earthly pleasures of intimacy, I would find this pleasing. However, this letter is most certainly intended for another and it would do only harm were I to act on it. Additionally, I must remain resolute and focus on my eternal quest to purge the world of daemons and their hellish offspring.

I shall thank Tammy for her kind words, but I'm afraid that her heart's desire is only in her mind, for there is no love between us other than the love between comrades, nor can there ever be.

Flame of my heart.

I have admired you from afar for so long. When times are darkest, thoughts of you make me strive to be a stronger man. In my time with the Midnighters, I have learned the difference between surviving by chance and surviving by risk. I've lived my life by chance for too long, and I want to take control now. I know there is a risk in getting burned here, but I'd rather risk being burned than take the chance that we never even try.

Next time I see you, we'll let a kiss decide where we go from here.

My heart is yours,

-Percy Winkley.

You crumple up the valentine from Percy Winkley to Flambeaux and throw it into the bottom of the reeking can of trash where it will never do anyone any harm, thus fulfilling the will of the universe.

A Valentine?! SQUEEEE! I bet it's from Proton!

Flambeaux practically wrenches the letter from your hands like a spider monkey stealing a fig and then proceeds to read the letter with ever widening eyes.

Oh, my god, listen to THIS!

He says, Flame of my heart...

Ooooh... that's SO romantic, oh my god!

I have admired you from afar for so long...

This is like, a love song! Oh my god, is he a musician?! That is so hot!

Then he says, when times are darkest, thoughts of you make me strive to be a stronger man...

That is soooo... emo... ok, I guess that's sort of hot in a dark mysterious sort of way...

Then he says, In my time with the Midnighters...

Midnighters? Those... those magic guys in the old suits? Oh. My. God! Proton is a wizard too!?!? What other secrets has he been hiding?

I have learned the difference between surviving by chance and surviving by risk...

Oh... a risk taker!

He continues with, I've lived my life by chance for too long, and I want to take control now...

Control, huh? I like that...

And then, I know there is a risk in getting burned here...

Ha ha *snort* oops!

but I'd rather risk being burned than take the chance that we never even try...

Oh Proton, you're going to make me cry...

Next time I see you, we'll let a kiss decide where we go from here

Flambeaux's eyes widen with excitement and she opens her mouth to scream in joy, but all that comes out is..

Oh! My! God! Yes! Double yes

Then she reads the bottom of the letter, her brow crumpling into a knot of confusion as she processes what she is reading along with what she has just read. Her mind works feverishly to decipher the strange combination of letters at the bottom that form a signature and a name.

Wait a second... WHO the HELL is Percy Winkley and WHAT did he DO with MY Proton!?!?

The valentine bursts into flames as Flambeaux's tirade begins.

Praetor Berry, also known as Neuron, appears before you. Even though you can only see him from the shoulders up, you can tell that he is working on probably a half dozen different computers out of frame while he is talking.

Hey babe, I managed to move some things around and I opened up 23 minutes tonight for us to sneak off and have a romantic Valentine's Day dinner, and I know you can't pass that up, so don't smash the Messenger Companion. See you at 8:17 pm at the Olympus Club, and wear something sexy... or rather, even more sexy, rawr... got to run!

Bobcat gives you a lazy look as you approach, that is until she spots the tiny Messenger Companion bobbing tauntingly through the air and her eyes grow to the size of saucers. For a moment you get the sensation that she is about to attack, and then the Messenger Companion projects its holographic message.

Hurray! He loves me! ^_^

Oh no, I need to find something super sexy to wear... ah! What am I going to do?!

I'd invite you to come help me pick out an outfit, but I don't want you to be jealous of what you can't have... Oops, too late. Nyah nyah! / Oh! You should come and help me pick out an outfit. It's got to be totally racy! I want every guy in the city drooling over me so Stephen knows just how lucky he is!

Come back for some more training, hmmm, Character? Well, I have a few special training techniques that I've been aching to use...

Praetor Duncan spies the Messenger Companion approaching and rolls her eyes.

Hrmmm, another one of Neuron's Valentines? I already told him that we could meet for dinner at 7:30 pm tonight at the Olympus Club with Anti-Matter and Praetor Tilman. He wants me to help make Anti-Matter jealous...

Ah, boys and their games. If only Raymond Keyes was less obsessive I might consider him for a bit of fun, but he's way too high strung and worries far too much about what others think of him.

I'm writing to you because I need your input on a complicated equation which is necessary to restore equilibrium to my current mental state.

The problem is as such: I recognize that I have experienced a great deal of anguish of late and have done my best to maintain my mental faculties despite the emotional onslaught. One of the emotions I have been experiencing appears to be love for you.

I understand that your reaction will be initially one of shock. Whether that is in a positive or negative light is the crux of the input I require to complete the equation I am wrestling with.

In order to provide the most accurate data, it is also necessary for you to understand the manner by which these emotions of love toward you have manifested.

Firstly, I regard you as a very strong and intelligent individual. You have natural leadership skills, a knack for keeping morale high, and I cannot see the Shining Stars existing without you. In short, I love you as a comrade.

Second, you are a beautiful young woman. It is no surprise that your appearance, and the pheromones your body produces, cause chemical reactions in my mind that give me a slightly euphoric feeling which can be mistaken as love. Similarly, pheromones I produce may cause a similar reaction in you at times, and repulse you at others. This is basic biology.

Thirdly, and perhaps most nuanced and important, is the social competitiveness between females in a social group for a biologically compatible male. Though I recognize that you are a more dominant and therefore less jealous female, it is still a factor that may weigh in heavily on where our relationship stands.

Finally, my own psychological standing, as noted at the beginning of this message, may be creating links where none exist in an effort to maintain a stable mental anchor with which I am using to support myself during this time. Recognition of this as a possibility discounts much of the impact it may truly have on our relationship because I am aware of it and have logically analyzed it from a number of angles. Still, it may be a contributing factor to your own feelings toward me as a friend, comrade, or potential partner if you believe that I am in some way mentally compromised.

In conclusion, I would like for you to consider the above points, logically, and then meet to discuss so we can define the state of our relationship.

-Proton

Did you read this?!

I don't know if he's gone off the deep end or what, but bucko needs to get his priorities straight. You can't go around slinging words like love with your teammates! It screws everything up!

It's post traumatic stress disorder is what it is if you ask me. Proton's head can't handle what's happened and so he's trying to ground himself, put out some stabilizers before he crashes. Right?

You know, you think you have a guy figured out all easy-peasy and then he throws a curveball like this your way.

Crap. If Flambeaux finds out about this I'm going to have to put her down... I better find Proton and set that boy straight before someone gets lit on fire.

Is that from Proton?! Gimme!

Flambeaux snatches up the printout and starts reading. She gasps right about when you figure she's reached the word 'love'.

OH MY GOD! I KNEW IT! He loves me. SQUEEE!

She continues reading.

Shock? Pshaw, yeah right, who isn't in love with me?

As her eyes continue down the page, Flambeaux rattles off the following responses to herself.

Darn straight I'm strong and independent. The Shining Stars are my super group, after all.

Comrade? Is Proton Russian?! I've never dated a Russian guy before.

Awwwwww! He called me beautiful and... what's a pheromone? Is he saying I sweat? HELLO, I can't help it if I sweat sometimes, I do set things on FIRE after all, jeez... ok, I don't even know what he's talking about right now about biology...

WHAT?! Competition!? I knew it! He's talking about Twinshot, isn't he! / He's talking about you and Twinshot, isn't he! Stay away from my man, hussy!

Oh! He's emotionally vulnerable right now, I need to go comfort him!

Dear Dr. Carl Egon,

Your experimentation into dimensional and temporal transportation has resulted in me, Professor Echo, being able to send this message back through time to myself, back when I was known as you, Carl Egon. Hard to believe, I know, but let me prove it to you so you can understand that the rest of this message is to be not only believed, but obeyed. Try recalculating your time travel equations by replacing the constant 'C' with a variable based on the age of the universe from the origin period and the destination period.

At any rate, after you recalculate your equations and see that your future self has indeed sent you this letter, I believe you will be ready to hear my warning. You will, in several years time, be compelled to become an agent of Arachnos known as Dr. Aeon. Pursue all possible courses of action to avoid this fate. I am living, future proof that becoming Dr. Aeon is an incredibly bad idea.

What I would recommend instead is for you to step out of your laboratory the afternoon of Tuesday, the 5th of June, 1979, and head to the university quad. Talk to Amy White. She'll be in a pair of jeans, ripped at the knees, and wearing her black leather jacket over that white rock band shirt that we both like so much. She won't have enough change for the vending machine. Instead of offering to pay for the bag of candy she wants, invite her to dinner. Trust me, all three of us thank you for that. -Professor Echo

Wow. Yeah, I suppose this one may have been lost in the transcendental post, either that or Professor Echo sent it back to the wrong time string. I can take this off your hands.

Why don't you take a spin on the dance floor and try to catch a few Valentines for yourself? You're really getting into the swing of things.

(In another secret lab)

[NPC] Dr. Aeon: Alright, who let Character. in here?

[NPC] Dr. Aeon: This is supposed to be a 'secret lab', alright?

HA! Thought you could foil our, I mean, my plans, eh Echo!? Man, I hate that guy!

Hey buddy, Just a reminder from yourself that somebody cares about you: yourself. Here's something to look forward to on Valentine's Day just in case you end up striking out. -Synapse

Hey, alright, what's the occasion?

As you begin to mention the card you realize that it is gone and find that it is burning on the ground not far from you. Synapse gives you a look as if he had nothing to do with that.

Nice of you to bring me this Valentine's gift, Character. Very thoughtful.

Swan reads the card and glances to the beverages, then back to the card.

This is so sad. Why hasn't that dummy found a date yet? I mean, sheesh, I'd date him...

Swan gives you a look like, 'did I just say that out loud?'

Right, so... I guess I'll go take these to Synapse then? Thanks, Character. Wish me luck.

Intended Recipient: Positron.

Introduction of self: U'Kon Gr'ai.

Subject: Earthlings too weak.

Consideration: Earth's surrender.

Reason: You cannot survive.

Request: Worthy adversaries.

Purpose: Improvement of battle skills.

Conclusion: You are grey to my threat scanner.

This is a most concerning message, Character!

I find it intriguing, however, that the Rikti threat scanners use a similar color code to identify classifications of threats. If I understand this correctly, he considers all Earthlings to be threat level grey, or no challenge.

Fascinating, perhaps their visual organs are not so different from our own... with a wide band of color recognition, which is definitely reinforced by the coloration of many of their battle suits...

The city needs the best. That includes you, Character.

What's this?

Blue Steel reads the message on your phone and his mouth draws into an even finer line.

U'Kon is in for a surprise, Character. Threat scanners can't read me, because I don't make threats... I make promises.

Dr. Raymond Keyes trusts you and so thus I trust you. Trust and honor means everything to me. I am trying to be true to the woman I used to be, to try and give her what she would want, and I believe in you I have found her heart's desire. This is why I have decided, on this fertility holiday, to express my interest in you in the hopes that together we can forge a relationship that is deeper than just friends and fellow warriors. What is your answer?

-Valkyrie and Valerie Kellum

Well, I didn't expect that. Valerie is a nice girl, but I have a strict policy not to date my patients. Especially ones undergoing personal identity issues. Still, she's obviously reaching out and trying to feel normal again, to figure out who she is and how she fits in...

Susan is never going to let me live this down if I take her out, and if I don't who knows how Valkyrie will take it...

Valerie? Valerie Kellum.

I don't think I've spoken to her in years, but obviously she hasn't been paying attention to my dating life, because Ms. Kellum is exactly the type of tall blonde bombshell I go for. I'll have to take her up on that offer. I mean, it's just one little date, right?

Vanessa DeVore cordially invites you to a stimulating evening of educated discussion. No illusions, no treachery, just a woman who knows what she has, and a man who knows what he wants.

What is this?

Mortimer's hands examine the envelope briefly before finding the flap on the back and opening it, his eyebrows furrowing quizzically as he does so. He then begins to read the note and chuckles softly to himself.

Fascinating. Let Signorina DeVore know that I would be delighted to join her.

(Yin Corp Warehouse)

[NPC] Tub Ci: Put your weapons away, Character is not here to fight.

Tub Ci studies you intently with his eye before taking the note and reading it, first casually, and then intently.

My intentions are my own to know, Character. You have delivered the note for Mistress DeVore, and I have no response to send back to her with you, so you may go.

Dear Mother,

Happy Valentine's Day!

I love you very much and am so very glad that you are always looking out for me. I know you always know what is best, and that it is for my own good. I will endeavor to become an even better son / daughter of Praetoria and always seek to make you proud of me.

Love,

Character.

(In Seer Sub-Net 772)

[NPC] Mother Mayhem: So precious, Mother's daughters so peaceful and calm and loving...

Thank you very much, Character. Mother is most appreciative of this thoughtful card. I will cherish it, like I cherish you, always.

(In Seer Sub-Net 772)

[NPC] Mother Mayhem: So precious, Mother's daughters so peaceful and calm and loving...

Thank you very much, Character, now let Mother see that Valentine you were so thoughtful to bring with you.

What's wrong, Character? You don't seem very happy to see Mother. Why aren't you happy, Character? Are you blaming Mother for being unhappy?!

ARE YOU!?

No? You aren't? Well that is good.

Mother knows Valentine's Day can be stressful, always wondering if someone loves you or not. Rest assured that Mother loves you. And thank you for the card.

Hey Lusca,

Ugh! I am so lonely this year. I hate Valentine's Day! I don't want to see another hero again, like, ever. The last one to come by was abusive and we only met up like twice. Hasn't visited since. Figures, I don't know why I'm surprised, that's all that ever happens. Why can't I find a nice plesiosaurus guy to hang out with?

Anyway, I'm officially striking against Valentine's Day, so if you are with me, come over. We'll capsize some fishing boats and eat until we can't move. -Sally

Lusca is a difficult girl to track down, let alone convince not to try and eat you in favor of reading a Valentine message from her girlfriend, Sally. However, she absolutely rocks on the turn tables, in case you've never heard her.

Hey, why don't you take a spin on the dance floor and try to catch a few Valentines for yourself? You're really getting into the swing of things.